Soul-Sucking Demons

Mad Julie exorcises her right to a demon-free workplace

So what do you do if you are stuck working with soul-sucking demons?

Well let me tell you my little tale of what I have tried, tested, and scratched out… before finally happening upon a very sophisticated means of revenge…

1. Drink Lots!!!!

Problem – numbness only lasts for 3-6 months and there are sober periods… hmmm….

2. Eat lots of Chocolate and Comfort Food for Emotional Recovery!!!

Problem – ummm 5 plus kilos later… hmmm….

3. Shopping Therapy?

Problem – the pay cheque doesn’t last as long as it used to… and then can't afford as much booze… hmmm...

4. Exercise out the demon toxins

Problem – hard to outrun them when stuck in a meeting… hmmm…

5. Hide!!!

Problem – they HUNT you down and CALL you… Hmmm…

6. Look for a new team to join?

Problem – you find MORE soul-sucking demons and the old ones STILL HUNT you down!!! HORROR!!!!

7. Take Sickies?

Problem – they ARE STILL THERE when you return!!!

8. Take a positive approach and try to get to know them better?

Problem – you discover these demons come from the LOWER LEVELS of HELL… hmmm… what now?

And nope, am already spacing out the drinking, chocolate, shopping, sickies, hiding and occasional bits of other toxins… and I refuse to join the demon ranks!!!!

9. Have a life? Hmmm… but what type?

You interact more with the nicer demons and discover they had angelic mothers;

...you smile and laugh lots and the soul-sucking demons become uglier with their jealousy to all (you are now not alone);

...you now look like a catwalk queen with all the exercise and shopping, while they favour bag-lady-esque fashion (YEAH);

...and you are fairly popular going to all the latest shows, movies and bars around town…  the laughter is your ammunition… (UH HUH!!!)

...meanwhile… the soul-sucking demons are withering in their bitterness and becoming fat and dumpy with new wrinkles and white hairs appearing by the hour… AND they are LOSING their hold… slowly their suckers are dying… and so is their poison…

10. SOLUTION – REPEAT POINT 9 TIL THEIR ASHES HAVE BEEN CAST…

the world according to Mad Julie

Mad Julie on...

working in an open plan office

...put up mirrors around your desk to see who is coming around the corner... then strategically jump under your desk and pull your chair in!

...get a bean bag... don’t fill it... place it under your desk or corner of your pod... and jump inside when pesky colleague/client/boss appears.

avoiding social occasions

...it’s totally the right day to pike :)

...do you need to physically be there or mentally? with or without attitude be there? or can you tell them that you will astrally project yourself there? then if it doesn’t work, it wasn’t your fault.

...pretend you have developed multiple personality disorder and today’s personality 'Margie' believes that she has baseball 2nite so can’t do dinner.

the midweek blues

...i'm struggling today and my head is woolly and overloaded.... maybe after my last meeting for the day i just skedaddle and crash on my couch.

...its sad but true - already over tuesday..... and in need of a glass of wine.... make that 2 gallons of booze!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

negative horoscope readings

...ignore it and just follow your path.... blissfully....

family

...hide from them!

rhonda perky

...when rhonda perky's closet door opens up unparalleled levels of evil spill out!!! remember pandora - well guess who taught her???


-MJ

Mad Julie gets positive

Affirmations for today:


i am vague
i am tired
i am fuzzy
i am mush
i am counting down the minutes til the end of the day and the week...
i am trying to hide from scary work people
i am sad the weekend is over
i am...............
...........................absent......